“A lot of single ladies do not realise that men, when looking for a keeper; are often searching for the girl next door look.” Here's what I had to say to Who Can Cut It about being and looking natural on those all imporant dates
Sarah is the newest addition to our team of experts at 'whocancutit'. She was nominated internationally for Best Matchmaker 2014, has been working in the offline arena of the dating industry for 4 years in Exclusive Personal Introductions in the UK. She loves a good meddle in matchmaking and has a lot to say to put the dating world to rights.
In her regular column Sarah will be on hand to help when it comes to first impressions, how to get it right and how to build your confidence.
When it comes to dating I’ve seen it all. Women can sometimes book whole days off work to prepare their outfit, make-up and what size heel they are going to wear. Often this is just a coffee date- can you relate to this? If not, as a Matchmaker I know many singles that can. If you ask my opinion 80% of women going on a date can’t help but overthink- ‘what on earth am I going to wear’?
See the thing is- a lot of single ladies do not realise that men, when looking for a keeper; are often looking for the girl next door look. Now by no means am I saying don’t make an effort but what I am actually to say is keep it natural. The make-up, the hair, the outfit- the whole thing. These are essential rules for dating and the only tool you need for your box is- to keep it natural.
If you rock up to a first date wearing Russian red lips from MAC’s latest collection and that cool smokey eye look then of course you’re going to give off all the wrong signals. Yes, indeed he will take note and perhaps you’ll even get a second date but chances are he will try his luck and will you really make that effort every day for the rest of your time with said match? No- I thought not. Keep it simple, a bit of lipgloss, some great volumising mascara and perhaps even a nice bouncy blow dry at one of London’s drop in ‘blow bars’ to boost your confidence. Surely, if you think he’s an actual keeper or perhaps even that he has great dating potential- surely you want him to see the real you too?
When it comes to what to wear I would suggest keep it simple. I always suggest to my matchmaking clients, single friends et al that you just can’t go wrong with a simple pair of black skinny leggings from Zara and a comfy yet sophisticated top to compliment. If you’re feeling super sassy then dress it up with heels and some nice earrings but never, ever, wear heels you just can’t walk in. It’s certainly not attractive and the last thing you want is to look a little clumsy!
Having said all of that of course all date attire is completely dependent on the location of said date- now if you are going rock climbing or doing something physically active dress appropriately and stick to relevant ‘active wear’ and not to don those Louboutins. With the rise of the ‘brunch date’ this is a great way to sneak jeans into your date outfit- it’s Sunday; we can make an exception!
I would say that when it comes to choosing that girl next door look- colouring is key to catching his eye. Pick a pallet that instantly compliments your natural skin tone and stay away from anything with a show-stopping slogan on it, make a statement with your personality and not your t-shirt’s political opinions. On that note- never wear trainers or converse unless you’re actually that cool Shoreditch hipster permanently.
Ladies dating is a mine-field, you don’t need me to tell you that twice. Make sure you keep it simple and stay natural. At the end of the day or the date in fact (excuse the pun), it is your confidence and personality you want to be remembered for to build a long-lasting relationship. Make sure your outfit, your make-up or your hair dye don’t over-shadow the real you.